The Art of Asking for What you Want

🤝 Hi Digital Travelers,

Welcome back to another edition of Adulting – your go-to guide for navigating this wild ride we call grown-up life.

Today, we are taking a deep dive into something that feels as complicated as assembling Ikea furniture without the instruction manual: Asking for What You Want.

Why is this important, you ask? Because somewhere between trading Pokemon cards and filing taxes, we were all supposed to master this delicate skill. Yet, here we are, grappling with the fear of coming off as 'too much' or 'demanding'.

So, why don't you grab a cup of coffee, or perhaps a glass of well-deserved wine (we're not here to judge), and let's get into it.

👾 Adulting Lesson

Who knew that one of the most pivotal skills to nail as an adult isn't budgeting or meal prepping, but mastering the subtle art of asking for what you want?

Fun fact: According to a survey by Salary.com, 44% of people never negotiate for a higher salary when offered a job, simply because they feel uncomfortable asking for more.

We're here to change that mindset!

Lesson 1: Acknowledge Your Needs and Desires

Our first lesson in this artful journey begins with acknowledging our needs and desires.

This is not about being selfish; rather, it's about understanding that your wants and needs are valid and deserve to be heard. To effectively ask for what you want, you need to know what it is you truly desire.

Whether it's a pay raise, a day off, or that last slice of pizza, being clear on your 'want' not only solidifies your objective but also helps you articulate it better.

And remember, your desires are not frivolous. They're as real as the avocado toast we spend our savings on.

Lesson 2: Articulate Clearly and Confidently

Ever found yourself mumbling your way through a request, only to be misunderstood or brushed off? (Been there, done that).

Our second lesson is all about clear and confident articulation.

When asking for what you want, be direct and assertive.

Frame your request confidently, backing it with valid reasons and if you can data. This doesn't mean bulldozing your way through a conversation but approaching it with self-assurance and clarity.

Practice makes perfect here - the more you do it, the better you'll get.

Lesson 3: Embrace Rejection and Keep Trying

Rejection - the dreaded nemesis we've all encountered.

In the art of asking, you may not always receive what you want, and that's perfectly okay. Rejection is not a reflection of your worth, but merely a part of the process.

Remember that each 'no' brings you one step closer to a 'yes'.

So, don't let rejection deter you. It's a part of adulting that even the bravest of us can't escape. See it as an opportunity to reassess and refine your approach for the next round.

📝 Actionable Advice

Advice 1: Spend some time each day reflecting on what you truly want. Journaling can be an effective way to clarify your desires and prepare yourself to express them.

Advice 2: Practice makes perfect. Try rehearsing your requests with a friend or in front of a mirror.

Advice 3: The next time you face a 'no', don't let it deter you. Instead, use it as an opportunity to reassess and refine your approach.

🎙️ Quote of the Week

✌️Closing Time

And there you have it, folks!

Together, we've acknowledged that our wants and desires are valid, learned to articulate them clearly and confidently, and accepted that rejection is not the end of the world, but a stepping stone towards the yes we seek.

So, the next time you find yourself shying away from asking for what you want, remember that you're not alone. After all, adulthood isn't about having all the answers - it's about asking the right questions.

Cheers,

Mike